short but sweet

hohoho. i just named this post short but sweet. why?? cos training today was short! (((: yay. but sweet?!?

-.-"

haha. im feeling crazy now. the xc is sooo near now and i suddenly feel overwhelmed. everybody says can complete the race one; but i doubt i can la. i mean i want to. but its near impossible. my heart will burst and die. i don wish to collapse. my thinking is so cowardly and pessimistic. but im like that! :D actually im realistic ok? i have low expectations of myself in terms of athletics.

anyway i don seem to feel erm- high after training. the brain is supposed to release endorphins which in turn creat a "high" feeling, but i NEVER feel that way after any training. even after the toughest of training. like i don feel satisfied. i just feel

horrible. terrible. worse.

):

why is it like that??? why cant i feel happy after training. and i seem to always feel a little giddy after training. :D

sigh.

forget it. i shall stop harping on this stupid xc and start to focus onm completing it and going for my cat class after that! (((((: i cant wait! i must complete it. i must die at the end. haha. as in die out only.

but ill live after that, only stronger! ((:

but anyway im back after erm- a few hours. and heres what i found out!!! NP is HUGE. and its HILLY. everybody rejoice! ((: im gonna enjoy my run.

and i checked up on kyle maynard. hes so cool. hes a hero and really really strong. (:

"its not what i can do, its what i will do"
-kyle maynard