underappreciated

im feeling depressed again. why is that when one problem goes, another greets u? haiz. i huess thats the life everyone leads. ): im so sad now. why must i keep doing this and that and then u still keep on nagging at me endlessly, like i have no idea what. ur pathetic nagging is getting on my nerves. im so gonna blow up soon. but because u are an elder, i shall give in to u. but honestly, do u think im gonna do this forever? let u step all over me and take control of my life? why cant u let loose a lil and give us more freedom. OH PLEASE!?! its just letting us do what we want at home. but u cant seem to recognise our bid for freedom or control of our OWN LIVES, not urs! and u keep telling me to do this and that, and not a wr\ord of THANK YOU. i say thanks alot to u, because to u, its i ought to, but to me, its cos u deserve my respect and i should, if not u will scold me. or nag. again. im tired, sick and waiting for the day i can finally be free of ur endless flow of words. they irritate, and if u happen to chance upon my blog, which is almost as likely as pigs flying, i will rebel against u. i can assure u that. mind u, if u lose me, u will never ever get a chance to say sorry or feel good abt urself. if i runaway one day, i will make sure i treat u like a slave. at least, i will treat u 2 times worse than u are to me now. just wait and see. i cant take this anymore.
i feel so underappreciated. like HELLO!?! what try to understand u. i know that u are really stressed out abt everything, and u need to relax and all but u cant cos of certain shortcomings and stuff like that, but so?! why cant u try to understand me? i thought that parents were the examples that children follow. isnt it right for parents to take the initiative? and not the children? why should i, if u as a parent, cant do it for me? why must i give in to u most of the time to please u? i wanna please myself this time, so if u cant bring urself to "lower" urself and swallow ur damn pride, DONT. i wont appreciate it; i will brush it off as something utterly fake. just ne thing that comes with that? leave me alone; let me do what i want. i can live without ur concern. rather ur over-concerning care for me. thank you oh so very much. oh yes. u don understan my nature of needing reassurance. when i asked u to say that u will support me and ur encouragement for me for my upcoming exams, u say, why do i need to? u know that will. like if i ask u to, how in the world do i know ur intention? why would i care even if i know. bloody hell! i need reassurance! not u know how i feel so i dont need to express my feelings(whether fake or real i dunno) kind of answers. how i wish i could have another person as u who cares for me and understands me more. and another of my other parent. oh yes.

i wish.